Some people describe their children as “easy” – they are predictable, calm and have positive new experiences. Other children may have more challenging traits – they are hyperactive, emotional, unfocused, and have bad reactions to new things.
Of course, every child goes through different emotions and phases. But, in general, children tend to have a usual temperament “type”. Read this week’s Pathway Parent Talk to learn more about temperament types, and why it’s important to understand your child.
What is temperament?
Temperament is a term that describes your child’s emotions, how they handle them, and how they adapt to situations. For the most part, your child is born with their temperament type. But, it is also influenced by their experiences, interactions with others, environment, and health.
Temperament Traits
Learning about the characteristics of temperament can help you better understand your child and appreciate them as an individual. It can also help deal a change in temperament to avoid misunderstandings and conflicts.
9 Major Temperament Characteristics
- Activity level: the amount of physical activity, motion, restlessness or fidgeting that a child shows in daily activities (which can also affect sleep).
- Rhythms or regularity: regular patterns (or lack of) for basic daily functions such as appetite, sleep and bowel habits.
- Response to new situations: the way a child first responds to a new situation (fast and bold vs. slow and hesitant). This can apply to people, situations, places, foods, changes in routines or other transitions.
- Adaptability: how easily a child adjusts to change or a new situation, and how well they can modify their reaction.
- Intensity: how intensely a child responds to a situation, whether positive or negative.
- Mood: how positive or negative a child’s words and behaviors tend to be on a regular basis.
- Attention span: the ability to focus and stay with a task, with or without distractions.
- Distractibility: how easily a child can be distracted from a task by what’s going on around them (sights, sounds, etc.).
- Sensory threshold: the amount of stimulation required for a child to respond. Some children respond to the slightest stimulation, and others require intense amounts.
How to support your child based on different temperament traits:
| Trait | Positive Aspects | Challenging Aspects | Tips for parents |
| High activity level | Energetic. Explores their environment. Active even in boring situations | Restless. May be impulsive, reckless. Easily distracted. | As with all children, provide a safe environment. Use distraction techniques. Provide time to “burn off” energy |
| Low activity level | Unlikely to disrupt activities. | Slow pace in completing tasks. Sometimes labeled “lazy”. | Give extra time to finish tasks. Make them realistic within a given time frame. Avoid criticism of child’s slow pace. |
| Irregular activity level | May not be upset by disruptions in daily routines. | Less predictable patterns of eating, sleeping, using the toilet | Require child to follow routines of coming to the table or going to bed, but don’t force them to eat or sleep. |
| Initial withdrawal | Shows caution in risky situations. | Slow to accept change. May reject people, food, and new situations. Can be very shy and have separation anxiety. | Introduce new things gradually. Talk about change beforehand. Let the child go at their own pace. |
| Slow adaptability | Less likely to be affected by negative influences. | Difficulty with changes and transitions. Takes a long time to adapt and adjust. | Set consistent, predictable daily routines. Prepare child for change in advance. Try multiple brief exposures. |
| High intensity | The child’s needs get the attention of caregivers. | Tends to express emotions in extremes. May tend to yell rather than talk. | Give general feedback, practice tolerance and model more appropriate responses. |
| Negative mood | Concern may get parents involved in issues affecting the child. | Fussy and tends to complain. May show little pleasure in words and actions. | Adjust demands that intensify mood. Encourage positive responses. |
| Inattention & distractibility | Can be soothes easily. | Tends not to listen. Has more difficulty concentrating and studying. Gets off track easily. | Give short, simple instructions. Address child by name, use eye contact. Repeat, clarify, and review. Redirect without anger or shame. Give breaks, reminders, and praise for completing tasks. |
| Low sensitivity threshold | Highly aware of changes in surroundings and the feelings of others. | May overreact to normal stimuli (light, noise, smells, textures, pain, emotional events). | Reduce stimulation levels. Anticipate problems and prepare child. Respect their preferences when possible. |
Effects of temperament
Every child has a different combination of the nine temperament traits listed above. There are three broad and somewhat loosely defined categories: easy, slow to warm up or shy, or difficult or challenging that most, but not all, children can be put into. These labels can be a useful shorthand, but none completely describes the child.
The “easy” child
About 40% of children are considered “easy” in temperament. They tend to have positive responses to the world around them and are only mildly or moderately intense. They handle changes easily and adapt quickly to new places and people. They handle frustrating situations with relatively little anxiety.
The “slow-to-warm-up, hesitant, or shy” child
These children tend to have moods of mild intensity, and are usually, but not always, negative. It may take them longer to adapt to unfamiliar places and people. They are often hesitant and shy when making new friends, and tend to withdraw when first meeting new people and circumstances. They typically become more accepting of new people and situations once they become more familiar or, “warm up”.
The “challenging” child
These children may have been categorized as “fussy” babies. When young, they tend to be hard to please or prone to temper tantrums. As they get older, they may still occasionally be explosive, stubborn and intense, and may adapt poorly to new situations.
Often children with the “challenging” temperament type can have issues adjusting at school including problems with behavior, focus, interactions with peers, and grades. When kids have conflict-prone temperaments, they typically have more behavioral problems.
Note: Your pediatrician can help you distinguish a challenging temperament from other problems such as undiagnosed recurrent or chronic illnesses, or emotional and physical stresses. These can cause behavioral difficulties that are really not a problem with temperament at all and need other types of treatment.
How to learn from temperament
Learning about temperament types and which best describes your child can help you realize that their behavior is, to some extent, beyond their control. This can help you become more patient with them and lower the stress and strain your child may feel from incorrect expectations.
Regardless of your child’s individual, innate temperament, you can help them build healthy behavioral skills and development. Use difficult or unexpected situations as teachable moments to model appropriate behavior and reactions. When you experience a tough situation such as a flat tire or conflict with someone like a family member, friend, or stranger, know that your child is watching how you handle the situation. Children learn from what we do as much as, if not more than, from what we say.
If your young child has a challenging temperament, keep in mind: if you understand and respond appropriately, they are more likely to change their behavior. As they get older, their intensity can transform from a negative to a part of their enthusiasm, determination, charm and zeal.